Monday Musings and Ramblings

Getting this one out a few hours early to make deadline.

Another of those peace-loving, forgiving, anti-violence liberals…who show their true colors when they let their guard down.

When you are tired of being old and get wistful about being young, think of algebra.

A Democratic candidate holds a rally. An attendee stands up and announces he has committed a crime by entering the country illegally, forsaking the laws of the land in order to further his personal goals. He says he wants to help the candidate but has no papers. The Democrat publicly endorses further breaking of laws by encouraging illegal aliens to vote and help her win. When caught on tape, the Democrat backtracks and covers up. The saddest part is she just barely lost, even in a district that was heavily registered Republican. Yes, I know, registrations obviously don’t matter, since anyone can vote now.

We are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

Sometimes you just have to keep a sense of humor. Scroll down to the bottom of the ebay listing and read his replies to questions. Hilarious stuff.

Why isn’t there mouse flavored cat food?

I am never amazed at the arrogance of yankees, especially when they begin slamming the South. Chuck Schumer got upset when places in the South received a higher percentage of Homeland Security money than previously allocated, resulting in a quote worthy of the Prejudice Hall of Fame.

Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

In yet another example of PC run amuck, a 6 year old boy is suspended from school for sexual harassment. Another young man is suspended for a year for trying to dispose of a 2 inch knife his sister mistakenly brought to school, before they even entered the building. A 12 year old boy is suspended for two weeks and charged with a felony for bringing sugar to school for a science project.

Monday Funny

A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read. One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and continues to read her book. Along comes a game warden in his boat.

He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies.

"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her.

"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am", he said as he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.